This was written in a hospital waiting room while a loved one was in an inner room and complete uncertainty. It focuses on the people who were around me where I sat, and their eyes. In that room I was astonished by the extremely secular atmosphere and the people within it. This poem is about the isolation every Christian must feel to be a part of God and his family. It ends by turning to the eyes of the Most High, the only eyes which truly see - and truly matter. Eyes
Sitting, doing little, talking; Sunlight dancing, playing, mocking; Sleeping doors, sweeping, locking, unlocking - The granite soles on granite floors The talking of a ticking clock Stuck between the five and four Advancing once, retreating back Sticking, unsticking, but undecided, Like a mosquito cast Out between two pores - Finally falling upon "stuck"... But never deciding where first to suck. And it is too late, and gone; The scarlet faces, the dismal eyes Which look at me, and look at nothing And fight each other off by looking, looking, Saying everything, and saying nothing; The mouths, the mirthless lips, half-parted, Grey and cracked, or grey and cracked and hidden Behind scarlet wax and woolen hands, Which sometimes open wide, unbidden, And the horror is revealed. "This was never planned to be! Again! Quickly! Be sealed!" And the walls collapse, A rush of water, a rush of air, And breath drawn in, urgently, But drawn out, and uniformly painful - Let the deed be done, but for Heaven's sake, man Do not repeat it. What then shall I do When everything (again) repeals And I am left where we have all (already) been? When all that was supposed to be open Once more seals - Ah, what then? Shall I feel what everybody feels? Or am I to be the one, the geek, the Child whom the educators Designate as possibly unique? Farthest from the equator - But maybe I'm that Island which they rarely ever find, But always seem to seek. Maybe it is best that I am hostile In their eyes. Take a peek! I am not a fool under disguise But a fool in spotlight. And this is my victory: That I am undefiled In the sight of the Eyes Which see.
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